we're all going on a winter holiday...

woo hoo. im going on holiday tomorrow. im excited becasue il be able to go outside without my face stinging becasue of the cold!

Have a good new year everyone!!

Im so glad that its not Christmas every day!!

Hello hello!

Christmas day was good! i expected it to be weird with it being our first Christmas as a broken family - lol - but it was actually really ok! But i dont think that guy who sang "i wish it could be Christmas everyday" really thought the whole thing through!! this would be everyday if you were me!

Start the day at midnight in church singing carols and talking to people who remember you when you were knee high to a grasshopper!

Go to your dads house to wish him a merry christmas and collect presents from various relatives

travel to your mums house in the back of a relativelty small car with presents acting as a seat belt, completely enabling you to move.

go to bed at about half 2 once everything is sorted and you have figured out where you are going to sleep

get up again at 6 and convince your brother to get up (this is no easy task)

open lots of presents in a hurry because you only have half an hour before you need to get ready!

leave the house at 7 am to go to work

go to work

get more presents

sing some carols

stand around looking random with a jug of orange juice

get a bit stressed

feel a bit bad for the people at work who are quite upset

get picked up at work at 3. Have a fun conversation with your dad who agrees that the person you were working with is an arse and tells you that he and his sister both bought grandad a digital radio for Christmas.

arrive back at your mums for Christams dinner with your family and extended family

open more presents

eat lots of food listening to the best of tony christie!!lol!

sort your presents about 60 times to make them all fit in to three carryable things

figure out how to play poker a different way (think to yourself that generally people just make it up as they go along!)

play poker with the poker set santa left in your stocking

watch eastenders

fall asleep during the 2 ronnies

fall out with your brother for annoying you when you are sleeping and confiscate his balloon

re-sort presents for the final time

go home



....i'd not like it to be Christmas every day!I imagine repeating that everyday would make me want to kill myself/my family/Tony Christie...but a good day none the less.

Jog on the spot!

spent the best part of yesterday doing last minute Christmas shopping with my mum. the shops seemed relatively quiet but the traffic was a nightmare. We decided that everyone must be out on a last minute christmas road trip randomly driving round the streets!

So we got stuck in this big trafic jam near the harbour and saw the funniest thing... a seagull jogging on the spot!!! im serious! its little legs were going so fast.At first we just laughed then my mum told me that the reason it was doing it was so the worms would think it was raining and come up to the surface (to be eaten by a giant seagull enevitably...poor worm!), it as really funny though, and as we moved (slowly)along the road we noticed all the seagulls doing it. You really should look out for it, its hilarious! anyway...what was more funny was that my mums next sentence begin...See Sam, its that kind of thing that makes me think that there must be a God (to which i laughed! because it was like a tacky cringeworthy bit at the end of a christmas film(or mums favorite programme "touched by an angel" - hee hee))

anyway she justified her point by saying "think about it, how do they know that stamping on the ground makes worms think its raining, its only us silly humans that need to be taught to do things, people cant teach seagulls that...God made them know to do that!"

Seagulls though...watch them...it's funny!

it turns out...

...That contrary to my personal belief which i have shared with many of you(3 people mabye now i come to think about it), my tear ducks have NOT dried up!!!

i cried last night for the first time in months!

...Over a stupid balloon : (

p.s yes, im taking bout an actual balloon and not referring to someone personified as one!

Why me???

Why do random (and i mean really random, not your average random!) people keep talking to me! They talk to me on the bus, they randomly stop me in the street, they offer to sing to me, they tell me their life story,they ask me the answers to their crosswords, they text me by accident and then keep texting me (even when i tell them they have the wrong number-because they dont know anyone else in edinburgh, and then they text me when they get a new mobile number),they ask me directions sometimes to places that im sure dont exist, they tell me about their holiday homes and invite me to them,they ask me to marry them....

How can i become less universally approachable??

A poem i wrote at work last week...

I was maybe tired or crazy or something but composed this strange poem this last week and have just noticed the bit of paper stuck to the wall so thought i would share...you wont get the full effect becasue you cant see the accompanying doodles of Mr Sad or his pickle, so you will just have to use your imagination!!

Mr Sad

Mr Sad has a tear in his eye,
Most people don't even know why!
But, when he was little
He choked on a pickle
Which nearly caused him to die.

Why? you might ask, does this still cause him pain?
Surely this pickle has made him insane!
Ah, the truth you have sought,
He likes pickles a lot
But his attempts to eat them now are in vain.

So, what can we learn from this miserable male?
How can he teach us how best not to fail?
Well, we learn not to wallow
If a pickle we cant swallow!
And here ends this terrible tale...

Another way to make your day!

...Do things that you weren't allowed to do as a child!!!

suggestions:

1) Stay up late, stay up til tomorrow if you want, no-one will stop you!
2) spend ages on the phone, you have permission from the bill payer!
3) eat an entire advent calender on the 1st december( your flatmate may wish to assist you!)
4) eat dessert when you don't finish your main course! (or just eat dessert instead of your main course)
5) chew gum, even if you hate it, do it in spite of those teachers that gave you saturday morning detention for it (oh wait, was that just me??)
6) Get a pet, or lots depending on how restricted your parental pet control was. I.e if you were only allowed a goldfish...consider an alligator, it could live in your bath. Actually....could that work?hmmm...
7) watch horror films, not on your own though, noone is that grownup!
8) have your friends stay over(even on a school night)or better yet, live with your best friend!
9) have a duvet day without having to go to extreme measures to prove you are actually ill
10) keep a blog,read other peoples blogs and spend half your life on msn, you no longer half to pretend that you need to use the internet to help you with your homework!